ROCKSTAR-pickup

Make it easy for yourself – hand out roles

May 22, 2010 // 2 Comments »

Heeey guys!

I’ve been lazy. So lazy. For days I’ve been thinking of writing a new article her. After all I have promised several posts a week…my bad. I’ve been busy these days. No excuse, I know. But I still love you, and I hope you still love me too But you can start calling me lazy boy. Just remember that by doing that you’re giving me a role I will most likely live up to. I recommend that you rather give me compliments for blogging often. Makes no sence? Well, keep reading.
This article contains human insight as well as routines. Enjoy!

One day a principle called three of his teachers into his office. Once they were all seated he carried on by telling them that he had been studying their scholastic methods and had concluded that they were the schools absolute best teachers. They were therefore to be given the privilege of teaching the schools most gifted students. The Principle also expected that the grades of these students would rise by 30%. The teachers were told not to share this with anyone else, because of the fear for discrimination lawsuits. The teachers were extremely excited. Who wouldn’t be excited by the thought of teaching the brightest students? At the same time they had been told they were the schools elite teachers, the very best. They were glowing with enthusiasm.

As the year progressed both the teachers and the students were observed. The teachers invested more time in the students then before, were more patient and committed than before. They even helped them after school hours.

The school year ended with the students scoring fantastic results. The grades were on average around 30% higher than the year before, as expected. The scientists who had come-up with the experiment rubbed their hands over the results.

The teachers and students had been randomly drawn. There was nothing extraordinary about the teacher nor the students.

What this all about? Well, the teachers believed that they were the best in their school and that the students they were teaching were the brightest, therefore the teacher now tought with much more commitment and passion then before. It was expected of them to do great things, that they were the best, and they then believed this themselves. Just like that, they had become the best.

This shows how important it is to believe in something. The saying “Belief moves mountains” exists for a reason. Mohammed Ali once said:

“To become a champ, believe you are. If you aren’t a champ, pretend to be”

So if you get a person to believe they posses a skill which they don’t have, that person will generate that skill by pure belief.

We have all been exposed to this. When I was little my parents told a pair of their friends that I was extremely helpful on the home-front, “You are so lucky to have such a helpful young man at your disposal” they said. This was of course not true, I hated it. But I liked this compliment so much that I wanted to live up to it. I started to clean and help around the house. A lot ! Every day after school I did the dishes. This didn’t last forever by the way, but the trend kept on for quite some time.

I have always been the class clown and too passionate and engaged in making people laugh, and thus not talking in class was like saying no to sex. One day my elementary teacher approached me and asked me to stay after hours. I was sure that an oral-rape was imminent for my bad behavior, but what she said was: “Rockstar, the class is very energetic and restless, and trying to maintain order is difficult. They all look up too you because to them you are the class leader and so when you talk they talk. So if you help me keep order, by not talking and making sure they don’t, they won’t because they listen to you. I would be extremely appreciative if you would.”
My teacher was a very clever person, apparently, because of course this was not the case. However I listened to her and swallowed every word, and believed it all. I started taking charge of the class and kept my mouth shut in class. She gave me a role and I jumped into it.

If you tell a person he is stupid, he will eventually succumbed to your statement. If you constantly address how bad behavior a child has I can promise you that if it didn’t behave badly before, it will now. People tend to accept who they are, consciously or unconsciously. Unfortunately people tend to become who others convince them they are, then listen to themselves. The power of knowing this and being able to use it can not be stressed enough.

Give people positive roles, give them roles you wish they had, and before you know it, they accepted the role and transformed.

Here are some examples of how you can use this in the field.

My danish friend Karisma, an incredible PUA, often uses this opener on girls: “You look so positive”. What does this line do? Well, he puts the target in a positive role, which she gladly accepts (who doesn’t want to be perceived as positive) and voila she is open for conversation, even though he is a complete stranger.

I myself have used this one to go from opening to general conversation:
“You are so nice! I was sure you were one of those arrogant types, like most of the females around here. Most people are terrified by the though of engaging in conversation with a complete stranger, but not you. the world would be such a happy place if there were more positive people like us.”

I often hand out “compliment-roles”/cold reads (Cold reading – to read a person without knowing anything about them) to ladies (and others) to achieve this effect: -You are so cool! – You are so spontaneous! – You are so adventurous, I like that! – Finally someone with hint of social intelligence, you like meeting new people too.

As a small bonus I will add this golden routine.

This routine can make it so much simpler to F-close (sex) the same night you met and also counters LMR (Last Minute Resistance) plus that it is an awesome cold read that your lady-friend will appreciate. I have used this a lot!

Here it goes:

I have noticed something about you. You have something I like to call a sexual energy. This means you are very free spirited kinda girl. Girls with this sexual energy are generally very playful and funny, not to mention adventurous. Does this sound familiar/ like you? It also means that you don’t have as many inhibitions as most people, you are spontaneous and don’t care what others might think. Also you like sex. This means you are a healthy girl. Now don’t get all boastful by this compliment, but it is a hell of trait to posses.

If she doesn’t posses these characteristics she will surely work to achieve them.

Example of how powerful this is: A lady flew from Norway to the Netherlands to meet me a week after I opened her online. Complimenting how spontaneous and adventurous a girl is can accomplish wonders for your game and this cold read is one of the tools you can use. On its own of course this cold read accomplishes little, but combined with the rest of your game = GOLD !

Let her work for it though, like asking her if she can handle receiving a real compliment. When she answers yes, tell her you don’t believe her and that you are unsure if you should tell her(open loop). She will start nagging and you can say: Ok, massage my shoulders for a while and if you do a good job I will tell you as long as you don’t get a big head about it. (As Juggler said – don’t give something to a girl without receiving something in return – be a challenge to give her the feeling that she has to work for you/invest in you. By doing this her “victory”, by receiving her end of the bargain, tastes so much better)

You are only a nerd because other people have given you that role. Do you accept it?

Posted in Openers/conversational starters, Routines, Various tips